Golfing Quotes - PORTUGAL - ALGARVE - NEILS TRAVEL WEB

Contract Menu | Expand Menu

Overview

A bit of supplementary nonsense.......A collection of quotes, in most cases highly applicable to the friends I travel with to Portugal! Please note that items,  in the above menu, marked with an * are now featured in my new Algarve / Mostly Luz section.

There was a time that a 100 men chasing a coloured man across a field was called the Ku Klux Klan, these days its called the 'open'. ~Author Unknown (2005)

May thy ball lie in green pastures and not in still waters. ~Author Unknown

The only time my prayers are never answered is on the golf course. ~Billy Graham

Golf appeals to the idiot and the child in us.  Just how childlike golfers become is proven by their frequent inability to count past five. ~John Updike

It is almost impossible to remember how tragic a place the world is when one is playing golf. ~Robert Lynd

If profanity had an influence on the flight of the ball, the game of golf would be played far better than it is. ~Horace G. Hutchinson

They say golf is like life, but don't believe them. Golf is more complicated than that. ~Gardner Dickinson

If a lot of people gripped a knife and fork the way they do a golf club, they'd starve to death. ~Sam Snead

Golf is a day spent in a round of strenuous idleness. ~William Wordsworth

If you drink, don't drive.  Don't even putt. ~Dean Martin

If you are going to throw a club, it is important to throw it ahead of you, down the fairway, so you don't have to waste energy going back to pick it up. ~Tommy Bolt

Man blames fate for other accidents, but feels personally responsible when he makes a hole in one. ~Author Unknown

I don't say my golf game is bad, but if I grew tomatoes they'd come up sliced. ~Bob Hope

My handicap?  Woods and irons. ~Chris Codiroli

The ardent golfer would play Mount Everest if somebody would put a flagstick on top. ~Pete Dye

I'm hitting the woods just great but having a terrible time getting out of them! ~Author Unknown

If you think it's hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball. ~Jack Lemmon

It's good sportsmanship to not pick up lost golf balls while they are still rolling. ~Mark Twain

Don't play too much golf. Two rounds a day are plenty. ~Harry Vardon

Golf and sex are the only things you can enjoy without being good at them. ~Jimmy DeMaret

The difference in golf and government is that in golf! You can't improve your lie. ~George Deukmejian

Golf is a game invented by the same people who think music comes out of a bagpipe. ~Author Unknown

If I hit it right, it's a slice.  If I hit it left, it's a hook. If I hit it straight, it's a miracle. ~Author Unknown

Hyperlink titles  have been abbreviated, (right click on the link and select properties for the full URL)

Double mouse click anywhere on the page to take you back to the top (except when over the links)